HAIRY LEGS – Songify Joe Biden getting fired up about legs and the hairiness thereof, launching int And it is time for a President, who understands: Coldplay is the best band in the world. That's wrong! You got that wrong. No!
Look – I… I got hairy legs! I'm best equipped to beat Donald Trump.
That's what YOUR poll says!
Vice President Biden, why are you a better choice than your opponents? [drum fill that recalls a 1972 Wilmington Delaware July heat wave] I got hairy legs. Hairy legs that turn blonde in the sun [deep exhale] In the sun Come rub my legs From the morning Until the day is done Til the day is done ––We are at the end here… I GOT HAIRY LEGS (hairy legs) Yeah! Ahhh! That's right, you heard what I said You heard what I said. I GOT HAIRY LEGS (hairy legs) Yeah, man––WHOO!
Watch the hair come back up again I'm the guy the best chance to win! Time is up, thank you… It's only 60 seconds, it's not up yet. And Corn Pop was a bad dude And he ran a bunch of bad boys, a bad crew It's my turn, yeah? Yes sir. / Okay… I really was the only white guy they really knew He said I'll meet you outside, and I said what am I gonna do?
CORN POP, HE CAN'T STOP, ahhhh! CORN POP HE WON'T STOP, yeah! Gee Whiz! That's time thank you. [thunderous applause] Why?
Senator Warren? / So, um, I'd like to talk about who we're running against: A billionaire who calls women "horse-faced lesbians" You could release women from those agreements immediately. Uhhhm… Maybe they didn't like a joke I told Are you willing to release them?
Release them These agreements were made, um, consensually [audience groans] And–– / ––I'm the only person on this stage that's Got hairy legs! SERIOUSLY? Hairy legs that turn blonde in the sun! We got other issues we're trying to get to– –Here's the last point I wanna, I–my time is gonna run out, here's the last point I wanna make to you: I GOT HAIRY LEGS [sound system begins to shatter under the stress of overpowering vocals and bass].
Uh, [unintelligible], we, we are a country where there are too many people that are obese. I am SCARED. [thunderous applause] Vice President Biden, I want to start with you. Why should anyone have faith that you're the one who can get this done now?
Cuz I'm the only one that NO, NO, STOP!! Let's talk about math Let's talk about math indeed! – Let's talk about math– – Okay, so here's the math – Coldplay is the best band–– – WRONG! Can I respond to the attack?
Why am I stopping? No one else stops. – Okay… – Joe said it right Here's the deal. Here's the deal, look! I think it's important that on Day 1… [tension rises, cellos play tremolo to build suspense] Day 1, I have more hair than anyone else I GOT HAIRY LEGS – I don't care! – Yeah! Ahhh! That's right, you heard what I said You heard what I said I was a pretty darn good life guard, I learned a lot We let this get out of control. Lived out in Mayfield with my Grandpop (grandpop) We used to play basketball with Corn Pop And he sank every single shot CORN POP, HE CAN'T STOP, ahhh!
CORN POP, HE WON'T STOP, yeah! CORN POP, HE SANK EVERY SHOT!! – Time is up, thank you– – I'm not out of time! He spoke over time and I'm gonna talk! Here's the deal!
I GOT HAIRY LEGS! SONGIFY 2020! Everybody vote if you can For your favorite woman or man You can stream this track from Japan to Finland Get the song here Have a great day and a great life, and don't forget to wear a life jacket and play zone defense against Corn Pop! I GOT HAIRY LEGS